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Thursday, October 30, 2008

I don't know

Ruby and Rebecca were not in school today so left 4 of us only, very boring. Watched Sister Act 2 during EPS quite nice and i like the songs..hehe:P Presented our LFS project draft to Ms Sadiah and she said it was ok..good good:D Then after that we were left to do our own things and we seated as a group to have a chat..Vicky, Ayu, Jena, Adlina, Atiqah, Sharifah, Sihah, David, Abdul, Qing hao, Ahmad and me sat tgt and chat...and we laughed like hell and talked very loudly, the loudest grp sia..hehe:P And we keep disturbing Abdul and Adlina..hahaha...damn funny and we keep laughing like nobody's business:P

After school went to west mall with Juan and Chan, and i finally received my bdae present..hehe:D So happy!!! This year's bdae is pathetic lah...wasted one year..sigh:( Ate our dinner and walked around, and we made a keychain, i loved it so much...got our photos...And chan, dun lose it hor...hehe:P I can't wait to go clubbing nxt mth, i need new clothes too!!haha:D

Chan, don't do anything silly anymore ok? Me and Juan will be worried de. i know this period is hard for u but just be strong ok:D Actually i nearly turned to smoking, becos i really need to relieve my stress...but my frens dun let me..hehe:P..But dun worry, i will try to curb myself and not smoke:D Got anything just call us ok..we will be there for you.

And thanks Nani for your concern and your advises:D

Byee

I don't know what am i doing...

what we could have been, 9:10 PM.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I am so tired, its hell today

School was quite fun today as we had housekeeping today, and we laughed alot. The funniest was Nani cos dunnoe who said his pants split after he did his kick and all of us believed also and we were laughing like hell sia. His expression and actions damn funny lah cos he use his hands to cover and his face was like so embarrassed then he asked Ahmad to see for him..but actually nothing, his pants didn't split..hahahaha:P Ms Deon taught us how to mop the floor and everyone must try, but i didn't..hehe:P but still it was quite fun:D

Did not feel like working today but still have to drag myself there cos no replacement...Hady is supposed to work today at 6 but he didn't turn up, Lien called him and he said he cnt make it.Damn it lah, he shld have called to tell, irresonsible sia.. And i alone have to run the floor, sian ah..Sasi is doing bar alone but he say he will help me, Lien oso came out to help me..thank ar..hehe:P If not i confirm cnt handle cos last minute alot of customers came in and it was chaos..cnt tahan, but still have to go on...too bad:( Had to sweep, mop and clear the whole place alone today, damn tired and finished everything at 10.30, cos Sasi helped me abit oso..hehe:P so good sia he:D This guy very funny and talks alot of nonsense..calling me this and that, and i hope i won't be free nxt mon or tue,becos i dun want to lie to him sia...won't say y..hehe:P

Tml have to bring my specs and wear my heels, cos need to let the dc teacher check again..so mafan:( I am so tired now but not sleepy leh. Just now before i start work i dozed off in the kitchen cos too sleepy liao but the stupid Sunny keep disturbing me...kanasai:@ Have to wake up earlier tml oso...I am so going to die tml:(:( My
arms are aching...can someone help me?:(

AND Ruby good luck for your paper 2 tml!!:D

Ok thats all, quite a long one..hehe:P
Byeee

Forcing myself to forget everything is the only way

what we could have been, 11:19 PM.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008

I am not looking forward in anything anymore, i give up - Life sucks

Slept at 3 plus ystd and woke up at 6.30 today, so i slept for 3 hrs onli..haha:P And i was damn sleepy today in class ok and slept in Elvin's class, i am always sleeping in his class one..hehe:P Got spot check today and it was totally unexpected, so suay, hair, shoes and contacts all not appropriate. Got extension, wearing flats and my contacts was blue in colour..stupid sia... Managed to hide my extension and exchanged shoes with Sihah, but my contacts kana caught cosi never bring the case -__- . And i am so pissed just now during the spot check cos Jena showed me something...i was like ok fxxx, y is it always like that...:( God why must you do this?

I am supposed to be at JE library now doing project de but i have to go home cos stomach pain, i don't noe y sia, not only stomach pain, gt one part above my stomach oso pain, cnt strain my right hand now cos i will feel something pulling there..Sorry gals that i am not able to go with u all:(... Played badminton just now and i played badly today, dunnoe y sia..not in a good form today..hehe:P Just received a call from xiao mei and she told me that i am working tml..shit lah..hais..

Never ate anything today sia just drank 3 cups of ice milo..haha:P no good sia...hehe:P And my mum did not cook my dinner so no dinner today for me today, stupid shit. And i am damn fucked up rite now, my mum is talking nonsense again, i did not make u angry it was my stupid sis who did that ok...stop finding fault with mi, wan to die go and die, or u want me to die instead so that u can have some peace? I am already in a bad mood today so stop provoking me or i will just leave.... I am alreadi feeling very stress abt my projects and some other things, can't things change for the better or at least let me have some peace at home? I had enough of everything already....sorry for this stupid post i just wan to vent everything out, but its kinda no use, cos i am still feeling terrible....k i think i am going to library to find Jena and the others...Not going to stay in this stupid house!!!:@
And get well soon Ruby!! :D

Byeee

Someone who lives in my heart...
I should have tried to let go, or i won't be hurting so much now...



what we could have been, 5:54 PM.
Sunday, October 26, 2008

I just want a peaceful life at home

Can't i have a peaceful life at home? Why can't my family be like the others living in harmony? I really hate it, why must we keep quarelling and making each other angry. Now my fucking brother is blasting his music, no peace. Everytime i would have the urge to just walk out of my house and never come back again, maybe everything will be better and my life will be quiet. I really can go crazy. Sometimes i wonder will everything be better if i don't have a family or if i never existed in this world... Maybe it will...Why must they keep on talking about dying this kind of stuff and i feel like telling them that i think it would be better if i am the one to die first, i am just tired of it...

I really don't know how to go on...

what we could have been, 3:28 PM.
Saturday, October 25, 2008

Still recovering

Met Tofus at JE today and head to library to do our project, did a little cos its really difficult, we need to think of soooo many things for the project, how how how...sigh:( Have to jiayou le..Had our lunch in a different way today..haha..so funny:P Then Ruby, Rebecca and Ayu had to go after that, left me and Jena. Then we head back to the library, hoping to continue our project, but we didn't, we ended up chatting with daryl on msn..haha:P Then jiu no mood le, so we decided to go IMM..went there and walk ard..went to popular and Jena was crazy ok, no i think both of us were..haha:P Keep playing like our house like that, and that Jena make me want to kill her..:P Went to mini toons and play again..hahaha..today hyper:)

After that we decided to go causeway point, go and see the back pack, so happy, thought today can buy my backpack le but did not but in the end cos i think it doesn't suit me and the design is very common:( I wan my backpack!!!:(:(..sob sob... It was a very tiring day today...and i am thinking how to spend my sunday and mon...sigh:( I dun want to rot at home leh, but i think i will:P

Byeee

Thinking of you

what we could have been, 11:47 PM.
Friday, October 24, 2008

I don't know

Affairs of the heart is damn complicated, what's love exactly, i really don't know. There are many things on my mind rite now and my head is about to explode, i always think too much, always thinking of the impossible. I hate it...I feel like a idiotic stupid fool now!!!fuck lah no mood to carry on alreadi...this is to chan b4 i end this post..
If you make the decision to continue with him the both of us will support and this will be the last chance you will be giving him because i really don't want you to suffer again because i know how it feels like, its very pain. I hope that this time he will really cherish you and not repeat the same mistake again. No matter what happen rmb that me and juan will be with you:) And hope you will be happy..

Can we turn back and be the same as before?
i miss the times when we are together

what we could have been, 1:55 PM.
Thursday, October 23, 2008

Disappointment

Once again i am disappointed by guys, something happened ystd, it remind me of me and him again and a question came to my mind, why are guys so heartless and why must they do something like this to a girl? I broke down ystd again, this time in front of my best fren, i can't control so i just cried. I know i shouldn't have as it was not the time to. i am sorry but what happened ystd really brought back the pain. Ystd was a very tiring and scary day ok, so many things happened in just a few hours. If we are unlucky ystd something would happen to me and juan and i still shudder when i thought of it. Anyway thank you David and Kaya for coming ystd although it was quite late le, sorry leh becos the both of you come for nothing and it was a wasted trip..haha:p But really grateful that the both of u came when u did not even noe what happened cos i am really scared at that time so i could not speak clearly, sorry:)I wanted to call him but i hesitated as i mean nothing to him anymore so its no use and it was quite late already, i doubt he can come out. But at that time i really hope the person who will come to console me is him as i know i will be safe in his arms, my wishful thinking indeed, i can only dream..

Was in no mood to study today and i just selpt through Mr Elvin's class. Sorry Tofus for having that black face all morning, i just can't make myself smile and my happy mask just can't seem to stay fixed on my face. But i feel better now:) After school went to have dinner at JE then went to library to do our research. We now have 3 big projects on hand and i don't know how are we going to finsh it as we have to work, but we will try our best to finish everything. For the sake of this term's grade. And i believe we tofus will be able to do it:D Jiayou ok:D Left the library at 8 plus and it was raining so heavily, but luckily i called my dad to fetch mi..haha:p
Rebecca, remember what i told u ok, dun feel bad for what happened today. All of us will have our different views and sometimes we have to express our ideas and shre as a group too. We still love you ok:D

And Ruby Good Luck for your paper tomorrow, do your best OK!!! JIAYOU JIAYOU JIAYOU!!! :D

To that bastard, if i find out that you do somthing wrong again, the both of us will not let you off, this is the last chance one more nonsense from u, you will get it from me and i will screw you. And i swear that you will never have a good time after that. A bastard like you dun deserve her ok..fuxx you..

Byeee!!

I can only dream of the impossible



what we could have been, 9:42 PM.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Woke up with a headache today, suay man frm ystd until now still haven ok, i am really going to die liao lah:( School was a little boring today, slept in Elvin's class and when Francis is teaching my eyes is closing:P cos really boring and i dun have the mood to study. Had s&w just now also and we had to run 4 rounds ard the school, really shit man y must it be today when my body is not in a good condition. But too bad still have to run so i just run finish the four rounds..finish running can liao cos i also dun wan to give up halfway:) hen played badminton with Jena, fun isa..hehe:P I love to play badmnton:D Although my head is going to burst and having stomach pain but still carry one playing cos nice to play with jena..hehe:P Jena nxt week we play tgt agin ok:D

Called my dad to fetch mi home again:P And he nag and nag in the car. Talking abt relationship thingy..haiss..fan ar. Becos of my sis lah, one wedding only gt so many problems, i also dun wan to care lah, just have to attend on that day can liao..mafan:P ok i think thats all i need to rest first, feeling so dizzy..

Byee

I am tired of wearing my mask, can i take it down?

what we could have been, 6:08 PM.
Monday, October 20, 2008

Tired Sleepy and Headaches

Went to JE with Tofus ate our dinner and we laughed alot..really funnyhahahahaha:D Then me and Jena went to library to do some research. And we talked as well:D I am feeling so so tired these few days and sleepy too, i would feel sleepy after using my lappy and would always fall asleep in front of it, and my mummy will scold..hehe:P She would always say got bed dun wan to sleep, go in sleep lah, dun play computer liao..haha. But i would not listen to her one and will continue to use my com:P I am having a headache now also, dunnoe y sia. Really hate it man, as if my head is going to explode like that, feel like knocking my head against the wall sia..haha:P

School was ok today cos i gt my Tofus..hehe:D And that stupid Daryl keep taking my hp, i really hate it when ppl take my hp, if they drop it i will really burst i tell you and i will kill that person..And that stupid abdul knows that i am scared of rats, shit man..i was like how did he know sia..dun care lah, he dun come scaring me with a rat can liao or i would really burst out crying...haha:P And Tofus he dun like me ok, dun anyhow say...we are just friends and we like to disturb each other tats all:D tats abt all today..i m tired...

Byeee

I just don't know why am i doing this...


what we could have been, 8:38 PM.
Sunday, October 19, 2008

Memories



My first aid com team members

GOH colour party (me,lixian,kelvin,edwin,crystal)

Mi and Binbin

My group and officers in NCO course

NCO course 2004 (zone 4) so neat :D

See how bonded are we (10 different schools) Non C0mmissioned Officers(NCO)

I miss my secondary school days, especially st. john. Although this cca is very tough and tiring but it made learn and achieve alot. And it also made me a stronger person. I still remember the tough trainings, camp and punishments, our seniors and officers would always be very strict on us, just a small mistake they will go 'down 20 or 30'(push ups), and we have to shout at the top of our voice for permission to recover our position if not we have stay there. Really can die. During First Aid Competition trainings we have to train from morning to night, to about 9 or 10 plus, really tiring, our parents would wait outside the gate for us..But our effort were not wasted esp our footdrills, we got top 3 for both of our teams once... Because our first aid and nursing was not very good so we focused on our footdrills alot. I remember it is very diffcult to remember the whole command as it is very long and i took a long time memorising it cos i am the leader(no.1)hehe:P But it is very fun also, training with our teams members and when we improved we would all be very happy for each other:D
Camps are fun and tiring cos we have to wake up very early in the morning, we have to go hiking as well...really can die..haha:P But it is very fun as well, esp when we became the seniors, we would scold our juniors alot cos they are really naughty. And at night we seniors will do anything we want..hehe:P Really miss the days and our officers, Mdm NG and Sir Koh, our seniors and our teacher in charge. Without them pushing us to train so hard we will not achieve so much and thanks to them i got A in my cca:Dhehe..really miss all those days..
I fake a smile so he won't see

what we could have been, 3:40 PM.
Saturday, October 18, 2008

Boring Day

Its saturday and i am at home...great -__-..haha:P Was in front of my lappy the whole day, and i think my eyes is going to pop out..hehe:p Anyway never go out also good, having sore throat, so dun want to talk..haha. Having backache also, i am having more backaches recently i also dunnoe y...pain leh:( Old liao..haha:P

I am hooked onto this song called Selfish by N sync, Jena recomend one..hehe:P Very nice song, i love it esp the lyrics...:D As some of it really say out my thoughts and feelings...:) Nothing much today..I only hope Monday will come soon cos i will be able to see my Tofus and Juan...They are the ones who keep me going in school and make me look forward to school everyday, without them i dun think i will be going to school, cos i dread going to school nowadays as the whole mood has changed and although this is only the first week of school, the timetables, lectures and projects are already weighing me down, i hope i will be able to cope and get better results this semester:) I really want to graduate out of ITE with good results, get a good job earn enough money to realize my dream.

I really hope i can keep myself going, i don't know why i am this weak and why i haven get over him. My feelings are still the same, i really don't know why. I want to forget him fast so that i can live my life happily again but at the same time i dun want to, i know i will be the only one suffering if i still hold on to it like a stupid fool, but too bad i just can't move on just like that, i am just weak at this kind of things... I feel like a fool now... What is love? Can i really find love or true love again? Will i still believe in love? I am already scared, once is enough. i dun feel that love is beautiful anymore because like people, feelings will change too. I don't want to experience the same thing again, its hell.......and i hate it cos pain and sadness is the only thing i will experience...

I am scared to love again
All i want is your love


what we could have been, 7:26 PM.

Selfish
N sync
I just don't understand
Why you running from
A good man, baby
Why you wanna turn your
Back on love
And why you've already
Given up
See I know you have been
Hurt before
But i swear I'll give you
So much more
I swear I'll never let you down
Cause i swear it's you
That I adore
And I can't help myself, babe
Cause i think about you
Constantly
And my heart gets no rest
Over you, you you yeah
Chorus
You can call me selfish
But all I want is your love
And you can call me hopeless
Baby
Cause I'm hopelessly in love
You can call me unperfect
But who's perfect
Tell me what do i gotta do
To prove that I'm
The only one for you
So what's wrong with being selfish
Yeah
I'll be taking up your time
Till the day i make you realise
That for you there could be
No one else
I just gotta have you for myself
Baby, i would take
Good care of you
No matter what is you're
Going through
I'll be there for you
When you're in need
Baby, believe in me
Cause if love is a crime
Then punish me
I would die for you
Cause I don't want to live
Without you
What can I do, oh
Chorus
Why do you keep us apart
Why won't you
Give up your heart
You know that
We're meant to be together
Why do you push me away
All that i want to do is
Give you love
Forever and ever and ever
Chorus
Selfishly I'm
In love with you
Cause I've searched my soul
And i know that it's you
Selfishly I'm
In love with you
Cause I've searched my soul
And I know that it's you
Selfishly I'm
In love with you
Cause I've searched my soul
And know that it's you
Prove that I'm the
Only one for you
So what's wrong with being
Selfish, selfish, selfish
So what's wrong with being
Selfish yeah

what we could have been, 11:11 AM.
Friday, October 17, 2008

Yea Yea i am back...hehe:P. TGIF today, had EPS and HSM today, not so bad cos we can go home early..haha:) Mr Francis had something on so there is no care session, and our group for the EPS project changed...so happy lah, can do with Tofus. If not i really dunnoe how to cope sia, such a big project. I think Jena oso very happy(cos u noe y)..haha:P

After school went to clementi with Tofus cos i waiting for Juan to finish her class den go west mall meet chan..Met Juan at about 1 at our school's bus stop den took a bus to west mall. Went for lunch after chan come, but i not hungry so shared something with juan:P Sat at the food court and talked for awhile then went to walk around.. I bought my contacts le...yeah..haha:P Bought 3 pairs for $56 buy 2 get 1 free, chan lah actually say want to buy then after that say dun wan liao, so i have to buy 3 pairs. But quite worth it for me, cos i will wear for abt a few months one, so 3 pairs i can wear for abt one year...haha:P For just $56 it is very worth it..hehe:P Chan dun scold me ar, cos if wear one month only very wasted, so i wear for 4 months..hehe:P

Sigh, next week not working the whole day cos Cielo sumitted the schedules le:( Sian lah...Want to earn more money but sometimes really tired leh, the timetable is really tight. Everyday not 4 jiu 5 release, if work 6 jiu no food to eat then have to go hungry:( Have to try to manage my time so that i can work more...Nothing much to blog today....haha:D

BYEEE!!

I can't make myself to forget you, i really can't
Unless i lose my memory

what we could have been, 5:49 PM.
Thursday, October 16, 2008

Tired Tired Tired

Back from work, one word tired..haha:P I everytime tired one lah..hehe:P Mr Francis treated the whole class to breakfast today..so good:) But i no appetite so never eat, gave it to Zaki..hehe:P Just drink ice milo can le:) Today Rebecca so funny lah..saw her F&B downstairs and said she want to say hi to him, But me and Ayu pulled her away..haha:P Then saw the china boy(oujisama) and Lim class, he and Lim keep looking lah i also dunnoe y...siao..haha:P Faster went back to class and tell Jena to go n see her oujisama..:P Jena and Ruby, shao ye is mine ok...i noe ur jealous lah cos he got car while ouji onli got one buy one get 10000 free vest and senpai gt his make up only...hahahahaha:P Ended school earlier today, happy, but its raining...stupid:( Have to rush to work but its raining and i did not bring any umbrella:( But luckily Daryl got so ask him to share with me..haha. and he sheltered me to the bus stop..Thanks ar:D Took bus with the others..

Reached IMM went to change and started work and i worked with Ricky again today..hehe:P Good good..But at abt 7 plus it was quite busy, also dunnoe y sia...haha:P Suddenly had chest pains again luckily a little while only and not so pain. Maybe i strain my left hand too much, carry too many plates at one go..damn heavy. But bo bian, busy so have to clear the tables fast. But closed in time today..happy:D And i heard that Nancy will be coming back nxt week..haha..i am soooo happy!!! Also thanks to karthigan i can have staff meal today or i will have to go hungry today..hehe:P

Messaged Zann in class today, cos i miss her. And she is doing filming lah..so shiok. Happy for her, got into the job she want:D She asked me hows me and him le and i told her what happened..Then she an wei me, make me cry again lah...aiyo..should have controlled. But luckily little bit onli and nobody saw except Tofus..phew..Thanks Zann for consoling me...i will try ok:) Hope to meet up soon..miss you so much:D

Read Jena's blog just now and i agree with she said and i also hope that our class will be united as before, getting along well with each other..but our class really seems so different liao..haisss:( Dun want like that leh:(...just hope everything goes well. Die liao..i am having a cough now and still got sore throat:( Hmm..maybe going out with Juan tml:)haha(random..haha:P)

Byee!!!

I hope things are going well for me...
I have not got over you yet..


what we could have been, 11:14 PM.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Tired Sick and Aching

My whole body was aching and i don't feel well when i woke up this morning, feel restless also. Thought i will be okay after that, but it got worse, i suddenly have no strength and my whole body was wobbly. Why do i have to develop a fever today? Got house keeping practical leh:( Thought my fever will get down but it got higher instead and i slept in class..haha:P Juan ask me to go home cos she say my forehead really very hot, i wan to go home becos i really dun feel well, but i don't want to miss the practical lesson. So i decided to stay, told Ms Deon i was not feeling well, she say she will let me go home after teaching bed making, cos she scared i will faint..haha:P But in the end i did not leave early..We learnt how to make a bed during our housekeeping practical, was quite fun, and i made a bed alone..haha:D And did quite well, so happy:P But it was quite tiring cos we have to stand up and down to tuck the bed sheets and dust were flying all over. My nose is very sensitive de,a little bit onli my nose will itch..so uncomfortable:(...We stayed back awhile to practice after that..:D

Went to JE with Tofus after that, Ayu, Rebecca and Vikki keep asking me to go home and rest but i dun wan..hehe:P And i insisted on going so they had no choice. Ate LJS..sick still eat LJS i abit siao hor..but i dun care..:P Then talked awhile at 2nd floor. Then head home after awhile:D Took a bath and i feel better now..haha. Have to thank Zaki for his medicine although its a flu panadol, and he and Samuel keep asking me to take it. I hate taking medicine esp pills...i can't swallow the whole thing, i need to break it into small pieces before taking it(like small kid):P And i force it down my throat just now..haha. Don't usually take medicine even when i have a fever, i will just leave it and just hope i will recover soon..:P

My whole body is still aching now and i have a backache too, i don't know why but this few times if i sit on the floor for too long without any support behind me my back will hurt and will be aching...stupid sia...Had chest pains on tuesday oso then now fever..sigh..so many problems:( i die liao..haha:P Will be working tml, got no mood leh, i told Reb and Ayu, if want i hope my fever get more serious den get mc and don't have to go work tml or i hope i will recover fully tml and be in a good mood then i will go to work..haha:P I need a new pair of contacts, cos the one i am wearing now is already 4 mths liao although it is a monthly contact lens:P Ruby keep asking me to get a new one, i oso scared will get infection so will try to get a new pair by this month(if i have the $$):P

What i am worrying now is the EPS project, cos its like a big project lah, i really dunnoe how to cope...sigh. Huiyuan, Hanthi, David, Nani and Maan is in my grp...aiyo..i really dunnoe how i am going to do, with David and Nani ok, but the others...Just have to try my best ba:D That stupid Nani in my grp confirm keep disturbing me one lor...very playful one lah this guy and very funny oso...always make me laugh onli..hehe:P

Thats all today..
BYEEE!!!!

i don't want anymore troubles
and when can i stop loving you?

what we could have been, 6:05 PM.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Tired and Pissed

School today was quite fun cos the lessons were quite interesting esp Mr Elvin's class..haha..damn funny lah, laugh until stomachache. David lah talk so much nonsense..haha:P :)Had our S&W, did some warm ups first, so long never do stretching le, very shiok ar, luckily i am still quite flexible, if not my years of training will be gone..haha:P Then we played badminton, and i am so tired now, my hands are also aching. I am tired not becos we played very long, becos we were laughing until dunnoe like what when we are playing...becos of some things..haha:P Asked my dad to fetch me home, lazy to take bus..hehe:p Having sore throat now, dunnoe is it laugh too much or wat, if not jiu die liao tats means i am going to have fever le...please no fever..:(

Called Juan after class as she told mi to and she said i nearly got into trouble, i nearly kana sued by someone becos of some things i blogged abt..i was like huh???wt -__-" Then she told me chan very angry den i called her...ok i am not going to say anymore. I apologise for saying wrong things and it was unintentional, i have already removed that comment. And sorry chan, becos u were wrongly accused..

Hahaha, and i changed my class tee number to 4 le, dun wan 14 le..becos i dun wan to be reminded of something, luckily Mas let me share with her..haha:D So happy lah cos can have my number le:D:D:D..haha

I am glad that my 'Happy' mask was on throughout today, although there were some moments when i nearly broke down but i just surpress it...tml is another day..sigh..:(

I am pissed!!!
BYEEE!!!:D
I am still trying to stop loving you
Take care of yourself

what we could have been, 6:30 PM.
Monday, October 13, 2008

I am wearing a mask

School sucks today, everything sucks. In the morning the whole class came to school early as we thought our class will start at 8, instead it started at 9..stupid lah, make us go to school so early for nothing. And our new timetable really sucks, 3 days of 8 to 5 again, i am gonna die...This semester we are going to take 4 new modules, that are Hospitality Sales & Marketing(HSM)(Elvin Tan), Life Skills(LPD)(Saadiah), House Keeping(HSK)(Deon Goh) and Entrepreneurship(EPS)(Francis). I see liao i sian -__- ...sigh...its gonna be tough. But i will just have to go on, go all the way ba:) Had assembly then we were dismissed, went to JE to eat with Tofus, then head home:) I hate school nowdays..:( And i feel that our class is different its not the same anymore, the atmosphere is different, just one holiday changed everything.

A mask is an essential thing i need now, when i go to school. When i stepped into school today i thought that everything will be ok, i don't have to scared, but actually i am just bluffing myself. Actually feel scared when i am steping into the canteen as i am afraid that i will see him, but luckily he is not there..phew... The laughter and the smile i had on my face just now were all fake, my heart is hurting badly inside but i don't want him to see it, so i have to put on that 'happy' mask in school. I really feel terrible putting on that mask, i have to smile even when i am crying inside, fuck...it really hurts..

I thought that i will be able to hide, but i still broke down before school ends and in front of them...i tried my best but still i just can't. I am sorry tofus, i really cnt take it anymore, my tears are flowing out just like that again, and i am back to where i was 2 weeks before. I feel like crying again again and again, i thought i had move on a little but the truth is i am still hanging there. When i saw him again today, i know i still love him, although i hate to admit to it, but i still love him...i don't know why...

What makes me feel worst is that he is behaving as though nothing happen, i should have expected that because he is not true to me and the relationship he had with me for that one month plus is just nothing to him and i am not his girlfriend just a girl friend or a substitute. I really wonder if there are any more good guys out there or any guy that will accept their girlfriend as they are...fat and ugly...Or they need a pretty girlfriend so that they will and can love them more and to show people that they have a pretty gf?

Wearing a mask to school everyday will be tiring, i look forward to the day that i can laugh and smile happily without faking it in front of him. Will that day come? And Tofus i may be shedding tears just anytime anywhere, don't be surprised ok...but don't woory about me i just need to cry it out again and i cnt stop it...i thought when school reopens everything will be ok but i am sorry i still cnt, really sorry..

Tomorrow i have to put on that mask again and i dread it...
Can everything go back to the same as before?
I really hate the life i am leading now, my life sucks...
I still love you..
Hope you are ok

what we could have been, 6:41 PM.
Sunday, October 12, 2008

Tomorrow is the day

Went to my grandma house just now. Played mahjong..haha:P And i lost, no luck today leh:( hais..my bro won, he sat at a lucky place lah..haha:P. Did not go to AMK hub, lazy..hehe:P Played till 7 plus and went for dinner before heading home:D

Tomorrow is the day, i feel like shouting...AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!. Don't know why, just feel abit stress and uneasy. But i know Juan and my Tofus will be there for me tomorrow, so i have to calm down...i can't imagine, tml jiu open school liao, wonder who will be our new ca and our lecturers for our new modules..and our timetable is it gonna be like the last semester or is it gonna be worse...i really hope it is not...:) AHHHH...can time just stop at today or turn back the time to a few days back, its really too fast, too fast....But too bad we can't stop time or turn back the time. I think i just have to go on ba...:) I can do it, i think..haha:P Can't sleep at 2 3 plus everyday le, have to tune back my body's alarm clock le..haha:P If not i am gonna die in class..hope i am able to sleep tonight..haha:)..okok..tats about all...Bye all, see ya:D

I am scared, i feel uneasy, i don't know why..
Tomorrow is coming...

what we could have been, 9:47 PM.
Saturday, October 11, 2008

.....

Stayed at home the whole day, never go out. If Jena never work can go out but too bad she was called back to work...haha..nvm, can rest at home:) Watched vcd the whole day, i watch My Lovely Sam Soon, this is the third or fourth time watching liao, but still not sian..haha:P Cos got Hyun Bin..he damn handsome ok..haha..Jena your Oujisama can stand one side liao..hehe:P And i am left with 2 more episodes jiu finish liao, so fast..haha:) Jena you watch finish alreadi not?

Tomorrow maybe going to my grandma house again..but go there abit sian leh..hehe. Hope can play mahjong:P If not can go AMK hub there walk,since my bro oso going, jus 5 mins walk away onli..so fang bian..haha. Can go see got nice bags or not..hehe:P Die lah..one more day leh...too fast liao lah, there are so so many things not done yet leh..arghh..faster holiday again leh..haha:P nothing to blog about today..so sian..haha:D

BYEEE!!


My Lovely Sam Soon


Hyun Bin [Xuan Bin]
i love him lah!! :D

what we could have been, 10:53 PM.

Stay Strong

One in life will surely have to go through many ups and downs, it is a part and parcel of our life. Having our friends and our loved ones by our side during our good and bad times will be better as someone will be there to share your happiness and troubles, supporting you and be your listening ear. And i found out recently that one will be very lucky to have a bunch of good friends by your side, supporting each other through our difficult times and share our laughter together, it is really a wonderful thing. I don't think i can get through this time without them, my sisters and my Tofus:D

To you:
Remember that all of us will be with you, like what your did when i am feeling down. Remember to follow your heart. Treat it as a wonderful memory, and live your life well again. At least you have someone who really loves you and love you for who you are. And i think that you are stronger than me lor...i am not. Remember what i told you ar:D

JIAYOU JIAYOU JIAYOU!!!

I hope everyone will be happy...:D




what we could have been, 11:42 AM.
Friday, October 10, 2008

Went out with Juan today, Chan couldn't make it so its just the two of us..Took mrt to somerset, cos juan have to go for x-ray, the fee was $80.25..so ex lah..haha..her heart pain cos the whole process took less than 5 mins and she have to pay so much..haha. Nvm lah, 2 years later jiu happy liao lah:p. After that we went to Heeren, walked around awhile, but nothing much then went to Wisma....walk walk see see..haha:p Did not buy anything. I have to go home early cos i having dinner with my family so we left at about 5...bused home, and it was so so long. When i reached home i bathed then we went out for dinner, only me, my parents and my brother. Had stingray...very delicious. The dinner was to celebrate my dad's birthday(yeaterday), me and my bro was working so could not have dinner tgt...And home sweet home after we had our dinner..hehe:D..

My legs are still quite tired...walk too much liao..haha:P Must rest the next 2 days...OMG 2 more days to go before school reopen...its too fast...i am going to look forward to the next holiday which is december, and we are going to have a class chalet....Yeah i love chalets!!!hahaha...Can play all we want till the next morning without any adults around and dun have to sleep..i love it..haha:p Can drink too..haha..Can't wait:D

i will have to face you in 2 days....


This is to Juan and Chan, my sisters

This is to the both of you, juan don't jealous lah k...i love ur one hor...don't have to say it out de, it is in my heart de, ur know can liao..haha:P
The 3 of us have know each other for over 5 years, although we only got closer during the last few years, our friendship is still going on very well, although we are not always together liao cos we are in different class and school. I really miss the times when we are in hillgrove, we would spent our recess together, after school we would go west mall to have our lunch then walk around and chat. And i remember juan would always wait for us outside our class b4 recess or after school. Then she would scold chan for being too slow...She is always the slowest cos her table will always be in a mess one, when it is chinese lesson her geograpy textbook will still be on the table..haha..so untidy, and she will always be late, let me and Juan wait for her below her block...haisss..haha:P

I am really happy to get to know the both of you, really. Although we seldom hang out together now or contact each other, our friendship will not change:D

Chanjuanshan(youcan, bamboo and dong gua):P






what we could have been, 8:41 PM.
Thursday, October 09, 2008

Tired

Back from work...my leg very tired. Yesterday walked the whole day then today work, just now quite busy too. Why today like that? Today is weekday leh:( And just now felicia come again,y i so suay one ar. Wed i never work she never come, then today i work she come..aiyo..kana caught...haha:P Tml still meeting Juan and Chan go walk walk, i think tml we just go walk walk little while then find somewhere to slack then talk..so long never chat le...really very long...haha. Anyway we have no where to shop either, so sian already..haha:P

I am so happy, cos i bought many things that i want..haha:P And 3 more days school jiu reopen liao..time pass really fast, one more day going to over liao...hais... And we are going to study new modules like marketing, housekeeping, lifeskills and the other one dunnoe what...haha:P They should have give us our new semester timetable first so that some of us can plan our working schedules, but they never, stupid..if not can work more days lor...:( Hope our new timetable won't be so tight..if not we confirm cannot tahan one..Ms Wen and Ms Hameiza not teaching us le, school is going to be so different..hais...as i said this holiday changed alot of things...why must things happen..i really dunnoe...i hope the next holiday will be better, i don't want anymore problems, once is enough..... And let's jiayou together Ruby:D It's our turn this time to parade!!haha:P

Hope time will heal all wounds...

what we could have been, 11:26 PM.

Tofus Outing

Finally had our Tofus outing ystd...but too bad Ayu and Vikki couldn't join us:( Nvm as Jena say, we still have next time:) Met Jena and her niece(Zena) at JE first..Zena very cute and Jena looked like a mother ystd..haha:P Then we took an mrt to queenstown to meet Ruby and bused down to orchard:)We went to Takashimaya first, Jena and Ruby was hungry so we went for lunch at Seoul Garden first. Eat until so full lah then keep laughing and laughing, nearly vomited, cannot tahan..haha:P And Zena can really eat, still can eat choclates and biscuits, Jena say she is a pig...so bad..haha:P After our lunch we went to meet Rebecca, and all of us hug her..haha. I think she like Zena very much always wan to hold her hand..haha:) That will be a load off Jena i think, don't have to take care of her cos she is busy enough le(busy talking)haha and Zena keep running here and there...aiyo.. The 3 of us were like thinking, if we really have our own children, how are we gonna managed, one Zena is more than enough for the 3 of us, really can go crazy..haha:P So difficult to be a parent..hais.

Next we went to find Jena's bag dunnoe at what plaza..haha. She wants the Volcom backpack, is was quite nice although is was very pinky..haha:p But the price is like..omg, $79..ex right..actually i also feel like buying one but too ex liao, cnt afford, onli Jena can:Phaha...But in the end, she never buy..haha. Next we went to Far East, went to look for my shoe and shop around too.. and i finally bought my shoe..is cost $20.70...quite cheap...so happy:D..then we decided to go Bugis..haha:)

Mrted down to bugis and went to the village, walk and walk, find and find, but did not find ant nice backpack:(..sad leh, that means cnt change bag le..:( Nvm, will go and find again another day:) Zena wanted to buy ear rings so Jena bought one pair for her and she was very happy, cos at Bugis she say she wanted to buy but never buy for her as Jena have no cash on her:Phaha..Then we went to the shopping centre to walk around oso..but nothing. I bought a handphone pouch..quite nice but the price say liao can cry,$8.50 leh..so ex lor:(..but what to do, find so long also nv see any nice ones so just but that one..haha:p Walk for quite long liao so out legs were all tired and we decided to find somewhere where we can eat drink sit and slack...and the most ideal place, the place we always hang out at...that is Vivo..

Reached Vivio and all of us are really tired, so Ruby and Rebecca quickly went to buy their dinner, Jena and me bought something at 7 11, cos both of us are still full and i don't have anymore $$..haha. Really broke liao...Jena..haha:P Then we went up to our usual hang out place, we sat there and eat and talk, talk alot, all of you know right...hehehe:P then suddenly i saw a disgusting thing, ok i am not gonna mention(you will know what is it when you read Ruby and Jena's blog)..And i nearly cried lah becos i really hate it..Then we changed place, i have a phobia of sitting there already, i am not gonna sit at that same place anymore...NO WAY!!! That Ruby is still talking about it after that...disgusting lah, i was like Ruby stop it but she is still going on:'(..haha.Continued to talk and Jena mummy and Zena have to go home early, cos Zena have to go to school the next day:) But Ruby, Rebecca and me stayed and talk...at about 10 plus we decided to head home:). Went to toilet and camwhored..haha:p Then we took an mrt home..

I can only see them on mon when school reopens:( And school is reopening soon, did not get to enjoy this holiday lah...stupid..arghhh..4 more days to go...slowly lah..can..hehe:P We were all like saying how are we gonna react when we see him on mon, i really dun know, mon den see...haha:P And dunnoe what will happen:P What we talked about ystd are all TOP secrets..haha:P ok..I am going to work later..yeah yeah!!haha:D And here are some picture we took, but Jena mummy not inside:( Jena is going to kill me:P










Tofus i am glad that all of you were with me during my difficlut times, i won't foget about it..
Thank you all very much and I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!! :D

And...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!!

I LOVE YOU!!

Stay happy and healthy always :D




what we could have been, 10:41 AM.

This is to my dearest Tofus

This message is to my Tofus...
Firstly, i want to say that i am really happy to have all of you as my frens, it is really fate that brought the 6 of us together, if not we will all be in different groups liao:)...Most of the time i did not really hang out with all of you, as i am always with my friends and with him after we are together, felt really bad.And i am really grateful that all of you were behind me this period, when i am really struggling inside you were the ones that accompanied me through all these..be my listening ear, giving me advice and supporting me. Without your i really don't know who to talk to or turn to as you were the only ones who knew what really happened and who know the truths...Without your i won't have so much courage to face everything, like i have to face him when school reopens, as i know all of you are behind me all the way, so i will not be scared..i will be brave as i know that all of you will be there for me always, and i will too, i promise... Alot of things had happen during this holiday that changed my life but it also brought me closer to all of you...So, i sincerely thank the five of you Rebecca, Ayu, Jena, Vikki and Ruby...accept ok..haha:p

I promise all of you that i will try to put everything away fast and start everything over again...i will be happy and not think about the past again, i will live well even without him... As i know that that is what you all wish and i won't disappoint all of you as i know that Tofus will always support me:D JIAYOUSS!!! See you next week...love all of you:D

Wait i forgot..i will blog about our tofus outing tml...cos it will be a long long one..haha:P See ya..:D


what we could have been, 12:01 AM.
Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Yeah Yeah Yeah!!!





Yeah! Tofus outing later:D Finally going to meet my Tofus..so happy lah..haha:D Ruby, Jena, Ayu, Rebecca and Vikki...see you later!!! Can't wait to see all of you:D Today we will shop till we drop..haha...not enough money can get fron Jena:P...hehe.

ok ok... I am going to have my early lunch now cos my mummy cook mine le, then go and get changed and meet all my Tofus at 1...:D Let's have fun today!!!
Byee people!! :D

what we could have been, 10:54 AM.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Wohoo!!

I am back from work and Lien got work today...so happy lah..haha:p But she was inside most of the time cos got me and Ricky outside, enough staff liao. But still happy tat can see her. This afternoon met up with Juan then went for a haircut, i was so stupid lah..only realised that the length of my hair is about the same after i reached IMM..i was like..sian....my fringe was ok but my hair length was not cos i want it to be shorter..wasted $14 like that:(.. After our haircut went to IMM, sotong called Juan and said he coming over so we walked around first while waiting for him then we went to have our lunch:) haha...went to Daiso after that then keep asking sotong to buy sweet for us...haha..and he really bought one packet..thank you:D

And And And...Tofus outing tml...so so so happy!!haha:D..Hope Ayu and Vikki will come..i wan everyone to be present. Last one b4 school reopens... Let's enjoy ourselves tml..ok? Shop until siao, but must bring enough money first hor..hahaha:P

If only its true...

what we could have been, 11:25 PM.

......

Will be working later at 5...yeah:) And will be working with Ricky but Cielo will be the shift in-charge:(...Hope Sasi work morning shift if not i really cnt stand his nonsense, must seal up his mouth so that he won't talk nonsense or have to find a boyfriend fast to stop his nonsense:P He's the second Agus(even Ricky so)...hais...fan

Meeting Juan at 1, we are going for a haircut...finally..haha:p My mummy not cooking today so must eat outside later, waste money:(...really miss home cooked food, hope my mummy will cook everyday because my mummy's cooking very nice, love it:Dhaha.. Looking forward to tomorrow..Yeah Yeah Yeah!!!:D That's about all, will blog later when i come home..hehe:D

Byeee..Will be back later:D

what we could have been, 10:47 AM.
Monday, October 06, 2008

Back from work

Just got back from work...sian. Cielo was the shift in- charge..seriously i don't know how to communicate with her, most of the time i dun understand what she is talking about...haisss..Today suay oso, Felicia dropped by, she is from the training department. Everytime she come everyone would be scared..haha..cos she come and spot check one. Sunny and Xiao mei will immediately put on their apron and today Ah Shan and Karthigan quickly check all their stock and they were like scolding each other becos some things are in the mess..haha..damn funny lah, i was laughing like hell in the kitchen:P Why must she come today, my attire all cnt pass one..cos i wearing jeans, never bun up my hair,my fringe never pin up...aiyo..so mafan. But nevermind tml cutting my hair liao...hehe:P

Just now Chan go imm, she was standing outside but i tot she is a customer..because i was wearing contacts so cnt see properly:p So stupid sia...Working tml again..got Ricky..yeah...haha:P hope everything goes well tml:D And i want to see Lien:(...hope she will come to work soon....hehe:) I am still thinking about my next week's schedule...school's timetable will be changing, so dunnoe when can work:(..Tml see how lah:P Got my last month's pay, so pathetic little, $45.80 only and they stupidly gave me a cheque. I was like why dun u just give me cash so that it won't be so mafan...still need to cash the cheque and it will take like 2 days..stupid:P

This post is boring i noe..haha..can only talk about work:P..Oh ya...tofus are we going out on wednesday? I wan to go shopping:D And thank you Jena for helping me with my blog, it look so much better now...thank you gal, love you:D I dun think this holiday can go clubbing liao, no time..Have to wait for another time ba:(

Life will get better and i will get over you...

what we could have been, 11:24 PM.

Quiz (the one i owed Jena and Ruby)

1. The person who tagged:
-Jena
-Ruby

2. Your relationship with him/her is:
-Both of them are my sweetest Tofus :D

3. Your five impressions on him/her:
-Noisy, hyperactive, nonsense, positive and a happy gal(J)
-Special, horny, open, cheeky and a very nice gal(R)

4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you:
-organizing a bdae surprise for me(J)
-Being my listening ear during that period(R)
(there are quite alot, this is just one of the few)

5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you:
-They will always be there for me(J)
-She loves me(R)

6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will:
-Tame her(hahaha)(J)
-Kiss her(R)
(but it will never happen)

7. If he/she becomes your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be:
-Tone down and not be so hyperactive(but it will not be her anymore)(J)
-Don't keeping going around kissing people(R)

8. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will:
-I don't think this will ever ever happen(Both)

9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be:
-I really don't know, maybe they stole my shao ye away?haha(Both)

10. The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is:
-Be there for them when they are down and be their listening ear

11. Your overall impression of him/her is:
-Crazy(J)
-Horny(R)

12. How do you think people around you will feel about you:
-I am a very quiet person?

13. The characters you love of yourself are:
-Happy go lucky

14. On the contrary , the characters you hate about yourself are:
-Sensitive and too believing

15. The most ideal you want to be is:
-No one, it will be difficult. Just be myself:D

16. For people who cares and likes you, say something to them:
-Really thank you for being there with me..and I LOVE YOU!!

17. Pass this quiz to 10 person you wish to know how they feel about you:
1.Jena
2.Ruby
3.Rebecca
4.Ayu
5.Juan
6.Chan











what we could have been, 11:34 AM.
Sunday, October 05, 2008

Random...

I really don't how can one treat love as a plaything...i really don't....i didn't notice what she wrote about him last time, what really happened between them, but ystd i read everything...all her feelings during that time. And now i understood how she was feeling during that period, her heart must be hurting very much and bleeding every minute and every second...i can feel it..

i just realised but its abit too late..now another girl is hurt again. And this left a really big scar on the both of them, which will be there forever i think... They will never believe a guy and commit themselves into a relationship that easily anymore...it will never be the same anymore. They once put all their heart and time into the relationship, loving him more than she loves herself, putting him in the first place and don't mind getting hurt by him sometimes. But what they get in return is a broken heart, a memory that they will never ever forget and will haunt them forever...

Love is blind, thats what people always say...when u are in love. Everything about the other half is good, even when your friends kept hinting you that he is not a good guy or that he is not guy for you, you would still choose not to listen or care and believe him...Just 3 words 'I love you' from him and everything your friends said(more than a thousand sentences) will not matter anymore...And you will choose to believe him and stay by his side...

No matter how hard we try to forget and try to live happily again will not turn back anything anymore, we couldn't turn back the clock and stop things from happening or at least try to minimise the hurt we will get....Love is beautiful but break ups are ugly....how much effort we put in will be gone in just seconds when the words break up are mentioned...and he will move on without you, leaving you hanging there, crying and trying to find ways to get back together again. Because she really love him very much, more than she loves herself...and couldn;t bear to lose him

But its no use, he won't bother about you anymore..looking and caring about another girl now...so what we can do is to try to forget about him...but can we really do that, erasing him totally from our memory, can we? Thats the question i have been asking myself. Why can't i hate him like the others did, i just don't know why, why i don't feel the hatred even when he did such things to me..It would be easier for me to forget him and not hold on to any more hopes if i hate him....can someone do something to make me hate him...please...

i don't want to hold on to this anymore, its very tiring. I just want to carry on my life like before, without any bad memories, without any sadness and the scar that now remains in my heart. I really hope that time will really heal all wounds, and maybe my wounds will also heal as time goes by, but it will never heal completely...

But i will still hold on to the hope that i will find the right one, the one who will love me for who i am and there will be no more lies...you too will, dun be afraid to love again when you meet the right one or you feel that he is the right one for you. Let's not bother about that guy who hurt us so much, we should move on and live a better life than him, show him that he is out of our life forever, he don't deserve our love....


I just can't believe that you will hurt a girl's heart so badly, and i didn't know that you are such a heartless person....does a status(single or attached) matter so much to you, much more important than a girl's heart? Even if she is just a substitute to you, you don't have to play with her, and in the first place you shouldn't promise her anything if you don't love her from the start, as you will never fulfill it and you will never put your heart into the relationship....so why start in the first place? Please don't hurt anyone anymore...
And to the person who i force to say out the truth, i am very sorry, if not for me you will not lose a friend...i am really sorry as i was too anxious and did not think of the consequences, hope you will not take it to heart and hope you and him will get better, and i won't blame you for keeping the truth from me...we will still be friends:D
ps.sorry if the words are too small, because i did it on purpose:P

what we could have been, 11:05 PM.

Just a short one. Went to my grandma's hse just now, and guess what i played mahjong..haha:P took over my dad for awhile cos he went out to buy something..And i won abit, i think..hehe:P After tat played with my cousin for a while and took some pictures and videos with my lappy, and he really enjoyed himself, jumping everywhere..haha. Then took him downstairs and went to Popular. Bought a storybook for him cos i like it very much, there were so many titles to choose from and he was like looking here and there..Promised him that i will but another one for him when he finish reading...he was so happy lah...cute sia him..:D ok..here are some pics we took..










Byeee...










what we could have been, 10:39 PM.
Saturday, October 04, 2008

I'm Back!

Hello..i m back..haha:P Enjoyed my 'outing' with 'u know who' very much..very happy today and i nearly laughed until siao lah...becos of something..haha..not gonna say:P Hmm..not gonna elaborate much on the 'outing' cos its a secret...shhhh:p Onli tofus can noe...cos only dey noe who shao ye is..haha. Then met Jena for dinner:D

I want to cut my hair..but lazy leh..hehe:P But b4 school reopens i will cut..haha:) Not sure tml wan to go my grandma house not leh..haha..my garandma not here liao but use to it..always say go grandma hse, although now it has become my uncle hse:P my aunt and cousins all going leh..aiya..tml den see how..haha I am looking forward to school reopening and at the same time not looking forward. Becos i will have to face him in the school and even in bla bla bla..fxxx man..haha:P So much can happen in a holiday..its gonna be a memorable holiday for me lah..really regret sia..really nonsense..haisss...

Seriously i don't know why some people can treat a relationship as a game, what the fxxx are these ppl thinking. Is playing with a girl's heart that fun, its ridiculous man and i hate this kind of ppl. You say u love her den at the other end u are saying u dun and wan a break up. At the same time u love another gal and not gonna mention others... dun u think u are too much..There are some things which are better left unsaid or i dunnoe how u will feel...and i bet u will feel the same or much worse than me...I have learnt a lesson, that their honeyed words are just sweet nothings..i am not saying that all guys are like that, some disgusting freaks are...and THANK YOU for giving me(n those who are involved) such MEMORABLE memories this holiday!! Didn't know u are this kind of person...disappointing, really disappointing...haissss

I really regret, regret giving you a chance to play with my heart...
The scar will always remain and will never fade, never ever gonna fade...

what we could have been, 11:35 PM.

It's saturday

Just a short one first...nth to blog about actually..haha:P Ystd stayed at home the whole day, my parents send my sis bf ( my future brother- in- law) to the airport, he is going back to malaysia...My sis is finally getting married, their ROM will be on 18 Dec..haha..happy for them although i am not on good terms with my sis:P..haha. And Happy Birthday Qinghao..haha

Will be going out later with xxxx, dun tell ur who..its a secret(ps. tat person is shao ye)..hehe:P Going to enjoy ourselves...haha..love it:D But i dunnoe wat time will we be meeting, haven confirm yet..:P hope this week will pass soon, cos i will be working on mon..wohoo!!..haha. But i think de shift in charge will be Cielo..damn:( But nvm will be working with Ricky on tues..yeah yeah:D so long never see him and work with him le..erm..the last time i saw him was last month i think when i went to get my pay...tat was damn long lah..haha:P...

Watching a hongkong drama now...the small boy in the show is very cute lor...sosososo cute..Aiyo feel like pinching his cheeks sia..but cnt..haha:P love children, all of them are so cute..haha(random) Walao tat kuku still haven wake up ar...lazy bum..haha:P Gonna msg tat kuku now..:P Will blog again ltr when i come back..see ya!! :D

If only everything was not a lie...


what we could have been, 11:01 AM.

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CHARMAINE!
Happy girl!
Sleepy Tofu!
4 sept 1990!
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Wishlist
▪ Shopping!
▪ More nice dresses
▪ More nice tops and bottoms
▪ Driving License
▪ Earn more money
▪ Traveling
▪ New watch
▪ New shoes
▪ New bag
New handphone-SE Satio
New wallet
▪ New bag
Crocs pink slip ons
▪ Pretty case for my lappy
▪ Camera
▪ Unlimited supply of contact lens
Memorable B'day celebration this year
▪ Lots of dates with Baby!!
▪ Lots and lots of SURPRISES
▪ My love ones to be happy
▪ Be Happy!
▪ My dream to come true
▪ The One and Only
▪ Attachment to go well smoothly
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